What have you been up to you say?

Well as usual I have been simultaneously very busy any yet haven't gotten nearly as much done as you would think one could get done in 1/3 of a year. That's right. Four months to the day. However, despite the fact that I am sure you were looking forward to one of my novella size meanderings over the many things I have done over the months but I have decided to disappoint you. I am going to stick to 3/4 of the story of installing a sod lawn. Yes, I just said 3/4 of the story. :)

Step 1 & 2: You have to work harder than you have ever imagined for days on end to prep your site. They say it is the most important part and so I gave it my all. This was our last shot since we have tried seed three times to no avail. I still ,even months later, remember how much physical pain I was in during the process. I can honestly say that I have never worked harder in my life. Needless to say, after upwards of 30 hours of hard labor we were ready for sod- which is why it counts as part 1 and 2.

So you caught me. I am terrible at taking pictures of a process. This is almost ready. The easy part was spreading a couple inches of good soil on top of this terrible soil we have. I think you get the point anyway. Plain old dirt that has been flatted and rid of rocks, massive tree roots and don't forget the 18 wheelbarrows of clay that I carted out from one area and completely replaced. That was really fun.

Yup, that's more dirt. Just what you wanted to see. :)

And don't forget that this very same thing was being done in the front yard too.

You caught me again. I am not good at pictures of processes I tell you. None of these are actually true before pictures but they tell the story nonetheless.

There you go, there's that pretty soil that cost lots of money and was ever so conveniently delivered to my little driveway. Why yes I did plan out that pretty design, thank you for noticing. And no I wasn't thinking at the time how hard this pretty little set up would make installing sod. Squares and rectangles are much easier. Don't bother wasting your money on a fancy sod cutter, trust me, a serrated steak knife works perfectly. :)

I am really bummed that I didn't get any pictures of the sod on pallets or the delivery. :( Or any pictures of actual working for that matter. Since I was solo during most of the process and I don't like taking pictures of myself it just wasn't in the cards I guess. (Just so you know David did the roto-tilling (which didn't eliminate several hours of my own handy pick work since our soil sucks as previously mentioned) and helped me install part of the front and we tag-teamed the back (thank god!) I am sure he would want you to know.)  I do remember thinking that sod is a lot heavier than I thought. It really shouldn't have surprised me since it has about an inch of wet soil attached to the bottom of the grass but really I learned a lot through the process.

The ultimate best thing about sod is that after only a days work you have an instant gratification yard with a beautiful lawn!

IT'S SO GREEN AND FLUFFY!!!

OOOOOOOH, AHHHHHHHH!!! BUT WAIT! THERE'S MORE!

THE TRANSFORMATION IS COMPLETE! MUAHAHAHAHAHA!

Okay, maybe it's not that exciting for you but it was for me. :) Oh yeah, that was part 3. You don't get part 4 because it is still a work in progress.

Beth's Turf Grass 101 (things you NEED to know):

1. It is a lot of work to put in sod.
2. It is A LOT of work to put in sod.
3. It is...haha, just kidding. :)
4. Make sure you count your rolls and are sure what grass is on which pallet if you are doing more than one kind of grass (we are not going to talk about part 5 which is when I found out that I put the shade mix in our full sun front yard).
5. Whatever clothes you wear will be permanently stained brown from the mud. You will be so muddy that it will hurt because the mud will dry and crack on your skin several times over seemingly ripping your skin underneath. Also, on the plus side, your skin will be slightly browner for a day or so despite washing. :)
5b. Parts of your grass will die without reason no matter what you try to do. It's okay to cry. I mean I didn't, definitely not, but you can if you need to.  
6. Enough about that, dogs are terrible creatures that will try to thwart your grass growing efforts. They like to dig up the mesh holding it together and shit all over it. Then when they do that and you pick it up it will regularly rip out enough grass to cause grass pattern baldness.
7. I will let you know how the rose canes/grass patching work out and then maybe you will get to see current pictures which will complete the odyssey we have begun and will complete your training on what not to do when planting millions of little grass babies.
8. Don't have carpet installed on the same day. Try to focus. One thing at a time I say!

Aren't you glad I only told you one story. :)